If you are planning to move to the state of MP for whatever reasons, there is a little checklist you should care to verify. First carry a lot of cushions (2 per person must suffice) as you will be facing one of the most gruesome roads of the country. Secondly get your hands on a hindi swear word book (something like “start swearing in fifteen days”), as its always better to know roman when in rome and thirdly ease yourself of your kids’ english rhyme books as MP government is planning to ban it in the state. The ba ba black sheep is going to be replaced by the songs praising the holkar dynasty that ruled in Indore.

According to the government, it is not fit for our children to learn a work of literature that has survived since people had kids (quick question: whos the CM of MP? dont google..check a daily). The government can make long claims about its intent of telling the young about its glorious past but in reality its exaclty what its is, a long claim. Trying to befriend the tribals of a state that has one of the highest number of tribes in it, they are giving it a name of glorification of our heritage. I do not have a problem with hindi songs praising Ahilya Bai, but not at the cost of doing away with Twinkle Twinkle. I agree with the fact that children must pride in our heritage and culture but this I do not feel is a step towards ensuring that. English rhymes introduce the kids to the systems of repeated learning. Being short and catchy they are learnt by the kids in very little time. Nobody can deny the importance of english language in the world of today, an early introduction is always helpful. Hindi is equally important and needs early introduction too but that is ensured by our friendly Bollywood (Tamma Tamma loge and hai hukku hai are exceptions). Kids pick up hindi songs just like that (snap).

To tell the kids about our cultural heritage plays, story tellings, films, documentries are a better option. For example in this movie Kinder-Garten Cop the kids do this little skit. The kids are wearing beards and standing in a line on the stage and one by one come to the front and tell the name and date of birth and one acheivement of the person they are emulating. A kid would say ” I am Abraham Lincoln, I was born in 12 Feb 1809, I was the sixteenth president of the USA”. Its a brilliant concept as all the kids taking part in such a play would know about all the personalities they are enacting. Come to think of it, just imagine a little girl in our country enacting Uma Bharti saying “I was born on so and so date, I was thrown out of the BJP and then I joined another party and said no when BJP felt like making amends and when the chance really seemed going out of hand said I was ready for an alliance”. INDIA well, we have our own problems.

The author is very serious about the cushions theory . The author has also lived long enough in MP to acquire an obsessive compulsion to swear. The author also dreams about living in one of those Hansel and Gretel chocolate huts and would prefer french fries instead of chocolate. The author is a good man.